I remember the times when I would be constantly saying: ‘BUT MY FRIENDS PARENTS LET HIM DO THAT’ or ‘ YOU DON’T LET ME DO ANYTHING’ but thinking about it now my parents weren’t very strict or overprotective at all, back then I thought they were the worst ever.
I’m going to give you some tips on how you can deal with parents who make you feel suffocated or left out from your friends as you can’t do what they can do. This isn’t to say they are bad parents, they may just find it hard to give you independence.
1. Make A List Of What Privileges You’d Like
If your parents let you do one thing they are afraid you may then use that to ask for more and more privileges, creating a list of things you really want to be able to do can minimise this risk to them. Depending of course on how old you are your list could include times you can stay out until, where you can go and sleepovers. Don’t ask for too many at once as you will risk getting none of them. Once you get a couple and they trust you it’s a lot easier to ask for more.
2. Why Should You Have Those Privileges?
Under each of your request on the list add a reason why you should be allowed to do that thing. Maybe if you complete all your homework you can stay out later, or you will do chores. Don’t compare what your friends do as this isn’t a reason in your parents eyes, give them a real reason. Remember DONT insult your parents.
3. Have A Serious Conversation
Schedule in a sit down conversation with them, don’t just hand over the list and say here. Maybe after dinner mention that you’ve been thinking about this and you’ve made a list. If this isn’t the right time to talk do it another time but make sure it’s a serious well thought out conversation. Try to make the conversation about them to begin with, explain you understand where they are coming from but say how you feel there is a middle ground.
4. Be Ready To Compromise
You aren’t going to get everything you asked for so you have to be ready to compromise on your points. Again remember if you start small you will build up trust and in time they will let you do more and more.
5. If it’s not working
When none of the above works you need to move onto some more points; Remind them that you are X age and you have become more mature. Explain how you’re social life is behind others because of these restrictions in place and you feel left out. Having a social life is a really important thing. If they still don’t agree to any make sure they know that even if you do fail or mess up something, that’s part of life and will mean you know how to cope with situations in the future.
6. Act Responsibly
This is by far the most important point, If you don’t act with maturity they aren’t going to give you extra privileges.